Put yourself in the way of beauty.



The things I overhear

In my job I deal with welfare recipients looking to find work, most of them are very kind or they just don’t want a job. Sometimes you have people who are third of fourth generation welfare and they do not know what it looks like to have a work life, for they have never seen that life.

As I was assisting a girl in her sign up, another girl came in wanting to sign up to the course. Now keep in mind, these people have never met, they met at this exact moment. The girl I was signing up I’ll refer to as A and the other I’ll refer to as T. I introduced myself to T and the course, A asked T how old she was. It turns out they are the same age. Then all of a sudden it jumps to her boyfriend broke up with her and wants to get back with him so she hangs out with his mum and she believes he will eventually see his way. T than states that she use to date an army guy because of the money and rental assistance. She said he caught her cheating so she is now dating an aboriginal because he gets loads more welfare and she doesn’t have to do anything…what.?!

Keeping in mind, this is ten minutes into their first meeting.

A starts to talk about her “DVD” collection in which she pulls out a photo of her room and she has also drawn them. T also has a photo of her own DVD collection…in which they ask if I have one, I don’t.

They decide that they are going to trick A ex boyfriend into meeting in public and she will force him into a relationship.


I signed them both up, I think the next few months will be very interesting.





There is a lady that rides around my suburb on the most colorful bike I have ever seen! Which has a bubble machine on the back and just rides around and I think, that woman is so wonderful.It just makes me smile so much to see bubbles and the world needs more people like that!


Do you ever have days that you are yearning a presence so much that it begins to be unbearable.

Passing souls, you feel a sharp shallow disturbance. They appear numb to your afflictions, continuing with their everyday errands.

They all seem so blissfully unaware your heart is in deep anguish, your world is collapsing.


Image credit – Growth/Decay, Artist: Jennifer Parks




Today was weird.

Usually I try and be more creative with my subject lines or at least try something a bit different and not give away what my blog is about. I do not have it in me today to change it.

My day started as most Mondays do, getting out of bed groggy eyed, reminiscing the Sunday sleep in and instantly regretting getting out of bed at all. As I am on the train people are also in the sleep walking mode and I love that I don’t have to hear Susan or Katie or some other woman’s name bitching about her friends, coworkers or family for 40 minutes and repeating the same details again and again to the point that you actually feel sorry for her narcissistic ways and daydream about all the scenarios in which you can help her, but you don’t. You just sit there, dreamy eyed half paying attention to the stops because there has been a few too many times in which you have missed your stop.

Now to the weird part, I get off at the right stop and there is someone dressed like a giant Pikachu, obviously something to do with the Pokemon Go craze? But there is no one around them and they are just walking back and forth, not saying anything. I started to see how dirty their costume was and walked very fast in the opposite direction.

I get to work and my manager states within the first ten minutes of me being there: “I have to tell you something but you can’t get mad?” straight away I am mad. I cant stand people telling me how to handle my emotions.(the red head in me takes over) He proceeds to tell me anyways, ignoring my annoyance. Pretty much the short  version is that someone at my work has put in a complaint for me talking to much at work? The crazy thing is, I dont talk much at work. I am always listening to Podcasts and I only talk when asked to? Because there is a huge age gap between my coworkers and I. They tell ‘Ya mumma jokes all day long. Being born after them, I enjoy memes and not repeating the same thing repeatedly. So that was really odd and I am dreading tomorrow when I am around them, mainly because I think I am possibly going to be a child about it. I just dont know how I can stop talking that much that I have been accused when I barely talk at all.

The last odd thing is when I was on my way home from work I got off at my station and this elderly lady pointed at me and called me “Pappa” before I could retaliate this younger lady pulled her away. I have so many questions for this lady.

A)Do I look like a man?

B) Do I look like an elderly man?

C) Should I rethink these glasses?

D) Were you just fucking with me?

The Girls – Emma Cline

I finished this book in two days, wow. It is such an easy read, makes you relive that teenage anguish in a way that I have not felt when reading in a long time. This book is has a strong Charles Mason cult story line. In a different way,  it makes you look at the followers in a different way.

Some of my favourite quotes are as below:

“That was part of being a girl–you were resigned to whatever feedback you’d get. If you got mad, you were crazy, and if you didn’t react, you were a bitch. The only thing you could do was smile from the corner they’d backed you into. Implicate yourself in the joke even if the joke was always on you.”
― Emma Cline, The Girls

“So much of desire, at that age, was a willful act. Trying so hard to slur the rough, disappointing edges of boys into the shape of someone we could love. We spoke of our desperate need for them with rote and familiar words, like we were reading lines from a play. Later I would see this: how impersonal and grasping our love was, pinging around the universe, hoping for a host to give form to our wishes.”
― Emma Cline, The Girls

This book made me cringe so much at my own adolescence years, the yearn to be noticed.